Embrace the summer. Embrace the summer. Embrace the summer. Ommm
Oh, hi there! Look at this, it's summer already. Spring kind of got away from me, and now? here we are with summer in full swing. It is already the fourth official week, and it is going well. Really. I know I complain about summer, she and I don't always get along, but I am working on our relationship. I'm learning to appreciate her better qualities even though some of them are the very things I find trying.
Like kids not going to bed, putting sunscreen on unwilling children, determining what to feed people several times a day. Cajoling reluctant children to attend swim lessons. Having to fight about how many times per week, or even day, it is reasonable to expect a treat from the goddamn ice cream truck.
Wait, I got off-track again.
Embrace the summer. Embrace the summer. Embrace the summer. Ommm
I was looking forward to summer, mostly because a good deal of this past year (if you mark time from my birthday in June from one year to the next) sucked. I don't really want to rehash it all, but I barely blogged because it just seemed like crappy thing after even more crappy thing kept happening, and I didn't want to be a whiner.
One of the worst things was that Scott hated going to school and was miserable pretty much every. single. morning. On the very last day of school, as he was going to bed, I said, "Wow, you survived second grade! Yay! Now it is summer, you must be so happy!" To which he immediately replied, "I don't want to go to camp! I don't want to go to swim lessons!"
I felt like banging my head against the wall. Please, oh please, no, summer could not be a continuation of the struggles. NO.
On the following Monday morning, after I took Scott to his first day of a week long basketball camp and Jane finished her swim lessons, I received a voice message from the therapist we were seeing for the OCD study.
"It occurred to me that maybe participating in this study is too stressful for you and your family right now," she began. What, was she kicking us out? I'd been trying to drop out of the study for weeks, and now, as summer started, she was telling me how stressful the whole thing was?
On Wednesday when we were supposed to go down for an appointment and discuss the situation, I told Scott it was time to go and he freaked out. Screaming about not wanting to go and slamming his door.
That was it. I called and canceled. I felt instantly relieved. Scott and I went out to dinner. The next day, after the basketball camp, we went to the pool and he remembered that he could swim and that maybe the lessons wouldn't be so bad after all.
I decided that he and even more so, I, needed a break. And what better time than summer to do it?
Now, nothing has really changed as far as Scott's issues, and I still find myself forcing him to do things he'd rather not, for his own good. He's been having panic attacks. But trying to be relaxed, to focus on the things we love about summer, is making us all feel better.
We've been swimming and walking to Grammy's house, playing outside and reading together. Ate the first tomato and cucumber from the garden. Watched fireworks with our cousins. Saw my nephew perform in a High School Musical production. Went to our friend's house for a big cookout and took care of our neighbor's pets. I've been running and grilling by myself (without Matt's help). All good.
Embracing the summer.
Matt is ridiculously busy with work, but we are holding our own here. I even laid off trying to get the kids to do summer school work until this week, when I finally started the handwriting (Scott is learning cursive) and grade-appropriate workbooks.
So far, summer is the break we really needed.
I do have one summer goal though that I will not budge about and it is, shockingly, being met:
Everyone must wipe themselves after going to the bathroom.
And as Matt said to me the other day, "Really, if that is all that you accomplish this summer, then I think you can call it a success."
I absolutely agree.
This is the kind of summer I want. It used to be, for years, that I would try to schedule time off around the winter holidays. And for a few years in a row it worked... I'd always be between jobs or transitioning through a slow period so I could take holiday, etc.
Now that I'm older with a kid I really wish I had the summer off. I wanted this summer to be a nice break, too, but I've been working so much it hasn't been as fun for my son as it could be. Ah, guilt!
Posted by: the weirdgirl | August 01, 2009 at 01:37 PM
I love this post. We too are giving ourselves a bit of a break and it seems to be helping.
And your summer goal? Awesome. If I accomplished that this summer, I would call it more than a success. I would call it a miracle!
Posted by: Patty | July 22, 2009 at 03:25 PM
It sounds like you are doing much more "being" in the moments of summer TOGETHER wuth your family. That's always a good thing in my book. :-) I hope it remains joyful and stress free (or less stressful?). :-)
The wiping? Good luck!
Posted by: Niksmom | July 15, 2009 at 08:40 PM
LOL about the tush wiping.
My five year old is, predictably, inconsistent on that front. I will be glad when those days are over.
Posted by: magpie | July 15, 2009 at 01:05 PM
So glad you're giving yourself a break -- it sounds like you could really use it.
Posted by: RuthWells | July 15, 2009 at 10:15 AM
KayTar is still in diapers, so no luck with tush wiping here yet. In fact, BubTar still tries (daily) to talk me into wiping his. I stand firm, though. LOL. Parenting is a trip.
Glad summer has been a good break for you guys!
Posted by: Kyla | July 15, 2009 at 08:46 AM