At the end of each month I receive an email from the NaBloPoMo people with the blogging theme for the next month. I look forward to this announcement, reading with excitement the new prompt. Each month I think, that's IT! What a great theme! THIS will be the month I start blogging again. Who wouldn't be able to take that idea and run with it? I start composing posts in my head, planning out what I will say when and how I will explain where we are and what happened during all the time when I wasn't blogging. Slowly, I lose enthusiasm as the amount of information I want to convey gets larger and fills my head. I think about all the posts I've started and abandoned. My need to do things "right" and my natural procrastination as I feel overwhelmed, take over. I think about how lame it is to blog sort of. I don't want to listen to myself, why would anyone else? By the time the first day of the month is over and I haven't blogged, yet again, I've already given up.
This month's theme is "MAYBE". May Be. How clever! Full of possibility. But also not a true commitment. Perhaps May will Be the month! Maybe I will start blogging again. Maybe I will be able to write about enough to get people up to speed. Maybe I will find my tribe again and people will actually be interested enough (or kind enough) to read here. Maybe I won't feel insecure about my writing or whether my thoughts are worthy of blogging. Maybe I will make the time for this...
Or Maybe Not.